Part 661: Anna A

Wow, nobody draws a crowd like Tiki. Talk about star power! I've known kings that would kill for that kind of adoring public!

The speech was a sellout AND I unloaded my entire stock of Tiki memorabilia. Somebody pinch me! I must be dreaming!

I volunteer for that duty.

Tiki?! Ha ha... You're as quiet and sneaky as ever! Hee hee! ...Hee? Wh-what's up with the scary face?

Is there aught you would like to tell me, Anna?

You mean other than...um...how AWESOME you are?!

I hear you charged admission to my speech on the unending power of good. Additionally, it seems you are hawking my signature like a common market trinket.

W-well, common market trinkets usually don't sell for 50 gold a pop! ...R-right? Look, come on! There was DEMAND, Tiki! The people just want to be a part of you! You get to spread your message, they get hope for the future, and I get a little coin! ...Er, or a lot of coin.

If your actions were so altruistic, there was no need to hide them from me. Yet even now, I see the shame of your deeds writ large upon your face.

But wait! Wait! I didn't do it for my own personal gain, I swear!

Such deceit only compounds your folly.

T-Tiki? Wh-why are you pulling out a Dragonstone?!

To teach you that deceiving an oracle bears a hefty price. Now still your lying tongue and prepare to be eaten.

Aaaah, WAIT! You've got me all wrong! I, uh... I'm donating the proceeds! Yeah, that's it! To charities! Shanty Pete's Orphanage gets some, and so does, um...the Widows of Gangrel! Oh, and I'm giving a big hunk to People for the Ethical Treatment of Wyverns!

...You were planning to give your profits away?

Of course! What sort of greedy monster do you take me for? That's rhetorical, by the way, so don't actually answer.

I have doubts as to this tale. Were you truly planning nothing more?

Wh-what, you mean like an unauthorized Tiki tell-all biography? Or, uh, selling locks of your hair and small bits of your clothing? Ha ha! O-of course not! Why, I'd never even consider such...things.

.....

Very well. I shall forgive you this once. But any events in the future will be open to all regardless of status or wealth. And you will give me every coin you have so far earned in my name. I shall see if I can't return them to their former owners personally.

Oh, come on! You're killing me here!

You are free, of course, to decline. In which case you may pursue a new career opportunity in food services.

Here! Take it! Take the money!

I am so glad you understand.

I understand you're a job-killing socialist...

What was that?

N-nothing! Pleasure doing business!

You know, Anna, a saleswoman like you could achieve true greatness. You should consider that the next time avarice tempts you.

Oh, I will, Tiki! You can count on it! (Tiki leaves) Wheeew! That was close! ...Now then. Time to earn back some of that sweet, sweet gold!